What is up with me?!

Love this. So very true, with regards to both losing weight and running, for example doing a half marathon. It's SO hard. But SO amazing.

Being a stay at home mom for the moment has been a huge challenge where my eating habits are concerned. I have NO willpower!! It's like offering a bottle of vodka to an alcoholic. That sort of seems like maybe it was meant to be funny, but I'm serious. It's absolutely an addiction, and one that is much harder to manage now that I am surrounded by the food in my fridge and cupboards all day long. At least at work, I brought what I brought, and that's what I had. The cafe' and certain items such as pita chips and tiger brownies were always a battle, but at least those I could say no to because I didn't want to be spending the money on them every single day. And I had coworkers who knew about my weight loss journey, and I hate to be a "failure" (in my eyes that is) by eating junk. But you know...damn...those tiger brownies were pretty freaking awesome...

So anyhow. There I was this morning. I already had a cup of coffee, an apple, eggs and a piece of toast. Yet I found myself staring into the fridge and cupboards. Why?! What is it that I want? I'm craving carbs, I can feel it. Sugary or salty, junky goodness. That, and I'm kind of bored, so automatically my brain apparently goes to food. Crappy food, at that. Why can't I crave something like carrots or salad? Hell, if we're going into the "Why can't I" game...Why can't I just have naturally amazing metabolism and a naturally great body?! Is that so much to ask for? Ha....Yes, I know the answer. I'm just being whiney.

I'm getting off track. Back to the story.

Instead of giving in and eating more, I hopped on the computer and started writing this post. I suppose that could be one benefit of being home - when I have these tough times, I can come write about it and hopefully get distracted and let the craving pass.

I really want to get back on track though. I'm back to exercising regularly (went a couple times last week and three times this week already), and I don't want to mess that hard work up with some pointless calories eaten out of boredom. I have so much I could be doing but my daughter makes it hard...she is pretty clingy and demanding of my time. I have homework and a job search to be working on, but normally when I'm on the computer, she insists on sitting on my lap and if I won't let her, its a big fit. Either way, I can't get anything done.  It's honestly a miracle that she is letting me type this now.

HA! I spoke too soon. *Heads off to see what all the fuss is about*